Friday, May 23, 2014

Horned Rat Top Five

So it's time to pick the Top 5 for Horned Rat VII. I've been through the list and to be honest there is anyone of 10 that could make the podium. However people want tough calls and where do you go if you want a tough call....that's right.....Fields of Blood.

#5 - Joel van der Ven-Long (Empire)

Seriously this guy is a chronic under performer. You take the best army, you take the weakest comp, you search the net, you pop 27 Valium and you play. However in Joel's case, you fail. Continually. Not once, not twice but 15+ times over three years.

Just like a room full of monkeys with typewriters will eventually write the "Complete Works of William Shakespeare", Joel will one day get a podium with Empire. I'm not going to miss out.

 #4 - Jeff Kent (Orcs & Goblins)

The anti-meta meta army. If you can't take Tetto then you can't take Lizards. Full stop, end of story, according to Jeff. As a serving soldier Jeff is conditioned to only consider one concept at a time. Eat now, March now, vanguard now, cast comet now etc.

So it's back to O&G. Well actually it is back to Green Dwarfs. More artillery than the Soviet advance on Berlin, a single's a match made in Heaven for the quartermaster from north Horrorwhenua

#3 - Hamish Gordon (Empire)

Skaven - too much head thinking

WoC - too weak since the new book came out

So where does Moneyball Gordon go? Straight to Empire.

See breakdown of tactics on the's a glimpse. Cast Banishment, shoot cannons, charge Demigryphs. Rinse and repeat for six turns

If he doesn't make the podium, there's always Warmachine.

#2 - Tim Joss (Dark Elves)

Most of you are lucky. You don't have access to the NZ ETC forum. If you did you'd get an appreciation of just how weak Dark Elves are. especially in an ETC environment. Tim tells us continually.

I suggested that he might like swap and take another army and he sprang up to an overhanging rock clutching his Dark Elf book

" You must not touch my precious".

Tim, to his credit, will now concede that Dark Elves could be as high as lower-middle tier, if they had Skulcrushers or Demigryphs as a Core choice.

#1 - Dan Butler (Warriors of Chaos)

The heavy lifter of the NZ ETC team. Mr Smashmouth. Dan is the Mark Geyer (look it up kids) of the NZ team.

We'll see him leave a trail of destruction through this field as he ties down first by 10am Sunday morning.

There is no subtlety in the list. Just get the number of the truck before the game.

The rest of us are there to make up numbers. Oh, I know Sam Whitt and Peter Williamson fancy their chances - especially after 15 weeks of Universal Battle But they have no more chance than the rest of us. Their Top 5 chances all revolve around late round chump bashing.


  1. How do you in the souls of men with such accuracy Pete? Haha, great write up, placings all mixed up but the rest is science.

  2. I'm telling you, the comp makes then so weak. I'd be lucky to even place in the top 40! This weekends going to be an up hill battle....


    Dark Elves are known for seeding misinformation...

  3. Hey, I'm just aiming for last place. That way if I do any better, I will have exceeded expectations. ;-)

    Kent J

  4. Hey Pete, I've nominated Fields of Blood for a Liebster Award, just in case somehow nobody else has done it yet. Why not, eh?